Dear daughter Elisha, I cried my way through this post about your dad, who I'm blessed to call my husband. I'm so very grateful that grace was with us through the last months of your dad's life. I feel a deep sense of awe and wonder at the sequencing of events from my call to you when your dad requested to go to the hospital. I knew you held the same perspective as I did about hospitals so you were my go to for a reality check. I was wailing and crying as I made the call, as it was the last place I wanted to take him. You said, "He must need something there, mom." I respected your consideration of his needs and requests. With reticence, I took him to the hospital, which took a huge toll on both of us. Little did we know that he would get a brain scan that would shift so much in the dynamic between myself, you, and dad.
I too experienced healing in a different way as I witnessed your dad going through a purification process and being stripped of all the he had known that had brought him comfort in the past: food, movies, and his business activities. He didn't eat the last 4 months of his life, he gave up his daily movies, he could no longer focus on his business. He never complained of being hungry or weak. His spiritual flame consumed all that was unnecessary. He grew bright and a peace came about him that I never experienced before. His frame grew lean and he took on artistic attributes that I had not recognized before due to the excess weight he carried. His presence was palpable and bright right up to the end and always greeted everyone who came to see him, with magnanimity and generosity of spirit.
Thank you for coming to spend time with us and for your daily phone calls when you weren't here. Those memories are indelibly etched into my memory and I'm quite confident your dad could leave, feeling the love and understanding you expressed to him after such a painful disconnect for years. I too found a new deep respect, compassion and love. May that love carry us into the unknown future of our unfolding story together.
Elisha, with tears in my eyes after reading this, I thank you again for your beautiful ways of seeing & relating to pain, at once in yourself and as part of our human condition. My heart has opened to your words and the energy behind them . I am now going to call my Dad while I still can from a different perspective. Blessings to the light of your soul for shining!
Awww hi Kirsti - I’m deeply moved that my words and this story have inspired you to pick up the phone and call your dad. 💛 sending you both lots of compassion and love
Elisha, your heartfelt post has touched my soul so deeply! My father took his last breath in my arms within minutes of my mother and him kissing for the very last time. As I held him in my arms, a fraction of his once strong, bodyguard physique, now down to skin and bones in less than 6 weeks... all I could say in that fraction of a moment was, "Dad, don't worry, I'll take care of mom."
They loved each other so very much!
We were living in California, my x brother-in-law talked my mother into financing a business for him and she moved to SC. My mother wanted me to be with her and so I left Calif, headed for this small town in SC was a bit of a culture shock... unfortunately, my joy was left elsewhere. She recently gave her life for me, after I stayed with her for over a decade, the PTSD was something I helped others with never realizing that we are all susceptible to emotional trauma, finding it difficult to cope with some of the choices in life that we no longer have the freedom to make a change has been a huge challenge.
Your story of your father and his journey through life has touched me in ways that I felt I needed to reach out to you. Your writing ability and story telling is so absolutely beautiful! You have an amazing gift and I would like to reach out to you in regards to a book I'm currently writing. Let's stay in touch!
Ceremony is a powerful thing. Humility. Respect. Honesty. Truth. Courage. Love. Wisdom. - These are known by many indigenous people as the seven sacred teachings. Thanks for sharing your story. Countless people suffer from unacknowledged trauma.
Dear daughter Elisha, I cried my way through this post about your dad, who I'm blessed to call my husband. I'm so very grateful that grace was with us through the last months of your dad's life. I feel a deep sense of awe and wonder at the sequencing of events from my call to you when your dad requested to go to the hospital. I knew you held the same perspective as I did about hospitals so you were my go to for a reality check. I was wailing and crying as I made the call, as it was the last place I wanted to take him. You said, "He must need something there, mom." I respected your consideration of his needs and requests. With reticence, I took him to the hospital, which took a huge toll on both of us. Little did we know that he would get a brain scan that would shift so much in the dynamic between myself, you, and dad.
I too experienced healing in a different way as I witnessed your dad going through a purification process and being stripped of all the he had known that had brought him comfort in the past: food, movies, and his business activities. He didn't eat the last 4 months of his life, he gave up his daily movies, he could no longer focus on his business. He never complained of being hungry or weak. His spiritual flame consumed all that was unnecessary. He grew bright and a peace came about him that I never experienced before. His frame grew lean and he took on artistic attributes that I had not recognized before due to the excess weight he carried. His presence was palpable and bright right up to the end and always greeted everyone who came to see him, with magnanimity and generosity of spirit.
Thank you for coming to spend time with us and for your daily phone calls when you weren't here. Those memories are indelibly etched into my memory and I'm quite confident your dad could leave, feeling the love and understanding you expressed to him after such a painful disconnect for years. I too found a new deep respect, compassion and love. May that love carry us into the unknown future of our unfolding story together.
Elisha, with tears in my eyes after reading this, I thank you again for your beautiful ways of seeing & relating to pain, at once in yourself and as part of our human condition. My heart has opened to your words and the energy behind them . I am now going to call my Dad while I still can from a different perspective. Blessings to the light of your soul for shining!
Awww hi Kirsti - I’m deeply moved that my words and this story have inspired you to pick up the phone and call your dad. 💛 sending you both lots of compassion and love
oh my goodness now am crying again reading your mum's incredibly moving post..... just amazing! thank you both for sharing with such wisdom & grace
Elisha, your heartfelt post has touched my soul so deeply! My father took his last breath in my arms within minutes of my mother and him kissing for the very last time. As I held him in my arms, a fraction of his once strong, bodyguard physique, now down to skin and bones in less than 6 weeks... all I could say in that fraction of a moment was, "Dad, don't worry, I'll take care of mom."
They loved each other so very much!
We were living in California, my x brother-in-law talked my mother into financing a business for him and she moved to SC. My mother wanted me to be with her and so I left Calif, headed for this small town in SC was a bit of a culture shock... unfortunately, my joy was left elsewhere. She recently gave her life for me, after I stayed with her for over a decade, the PTSD was something I helped others with never realizing that we are all susceptible to emotional trauma, finding it difficult to cope with some of the choices in life that we no longer have the freedom to make a change has been a huge challenge.
Your story of your father and his journey through life has touched me in ways that I felt I needed to reach out to you. Your writing ability and story telling is so absolutely beautiful! You have an amazing gift and I would like to reach out to you in regards to a book I'm currently writing. Let's stay in touch!
Ceremony is a powerful thing. Humility. Respect. Honesty. Truth. Courage. Love. Wisdom. - These are known by many indigenous people as the seven sacred teachings. Thanks for sharing your story. Countless people suffer from unacknowledged trauma.